In this episode, I discuss why I’m taking a week to fuck off of social media and socializing. I also address some of the backlash that I got from Episode #4 and how it is reminiscent of past scuffles with insecure drag artists who contaminate the scenes that they’re in through needless shadiness.
As always, you can find this episode in the webplayer below, along with all other relevant show links over at linktr.ee/greggonewild/
since the quarantine orders have hit and even before that, both the politics of our situation combined with an equal amount of lunacy and irresponsibility in the social media sphere have exhausted me to the point where I’ve become actively cynical of the future – and that’s not healthy.
We’ve known since November that a deadly virus was spreading in China and that the Chinese government has a less than transparent way of handling sensitive news and information that challenges their global reputation. The whistle blower who attempted to alert the world about the virus was jailed and eventually died from the virus, while another whistle blower remains missing. and in January- U.S. Senators were receiving private briefings and selling off stock based off of classified information about the potential effects that the virus could have on the U.S. population (and by extension, the consequences that it could have on U.S. financial markets).
Seeing how conservative media conglomerates and institutions like FOX News willfully put populations at harm; knowing that the president is a habitual liar, and then on that very same note seeing people defend the president, DESPITE all evidence of congressional corruption in this time is very telling about the lack of class solidarity that we have as a country, and the power that these institutions have in crafting consequential societal narratives.
The fact that there are still people meeting in hordes to go to church despite the fact that such gatherings have lead to deaths and hospitalizations elevates this fever dream of stupidity into a dangerous and deadly reality for the public at large.
The blame doesn’t end at republicans and Fox news though, Joe Biden’s campaign and the chair of the Democratic National Committee, Tom Perez did nothing to discourage the Florida, Arizona and Illinois democratic primaries from continuing forward, and Joe Biden’s campaign actually pushed to keep the primary dates and planned on more “party unity” attacks for Bernie if things didn’t pan out how they wanted. (In the podcast I mentioned Ohio, but it’s discussed in this video that the decision to delay was shot down by the court but was eventually delayed again by the governor) Biden had remained mostly absent in action– while Bernie Sanders made no mention to urge voters to risk their health by going out in public in the midst of a pandemic and had been doing nonstop live streams and policy pushes to help relieve and inform the american working class.
In any other situation, frustrated people like myself would naturally protest or gather at public institutions demanding responsibility or organizing in person to coordinate political consequences and opposition for the president and his ilk, as well as DNC officials who put people at risk by continuing to push for pandemic primary voting during election season and even after the election is over- but this virus discourages that type of organizing, and others like me don’t have the luxury of being stupid beyond all reason to ignore the empirical evidence suggesting all the reasons why that would be a bad idea.
So what then are we left to do? What outlets do we have? Well social media is there, sure, but at this point the types of discussion through these channels have become tainted with even more misinformation, more cognitive dissonance and more toxic discourse than the television.
In many ways, it exemplifies the confusion and misplaced anger, as well as the lethargy for accountability that lead to the perfect culmination of this deadly pandemic.
So I’ll be taking a break from all of it. Both online and offline- because when it comes to airing out grievances regarding the spectacular lack of accountability, we’re already shouting in the void; and at this point, I think it’s more cruel to the void to remove your voice from the equation. Silence has now become my preferred method of protest.
On another note, the unproductive insults leveled at me through petty comments and characterizations of perceived cuntyness by members of the house of Lepore from episode #4 has only elevated my social exhaustion.
In Episode 4, I recalled calling Girl 6 ahead of the episode’s recording and release to let her know that I’d be bringing up our unfriendly meeting two years ago, and revealing some of my anxious thoughts following the touching disqualification from Magical Realness.
While the call remained friendly for the most part, there was a bit of “fierce defensiveness” when I mentioned how she had touched her competitor at my ball. She denied ever doing so and raised her voice at me while reminding me that she’s “the gatekeeper” of balls in Texas. This is despite the fact that there’s video proof of her grabbing the boots of her competitor and sitting on her as I grabbed results from my judges.
Two days later after our call, I noticed I had been unfriended and blocked on different social media sites by her before the episode even aired.
As if that weren’t telling enough about how deliberately misconstrued my comments on the podcast were, I also got a good series of tweets hurled my way by her and other members of the house of lepore accusing me of disrespecting the house and mischaracterizing my intentions on the whole episode.
Nowhere in Episode 4 did I say anything that wasn’t true about how I felt immediately following my elimination or how things unfolded regarding my past experience with mother lepore, I mentioned everything that I discussed in my episode in the phone call with her, including how she touched her competitor at my ball a couple of years ago, and I also insisted time and time again both in the call and in the episode that a lot of the thoughts that initially ran through my head were born out of anxiety, and that I gave no credit to them.
Seeing the needless backlash and the caustic nature of the attacks hurled at me on Twitter though, begin to make me think that maybe those anxious thoughts were actually misplaced instincts.
If you’re so sensitive to perceived notions of criticism – so much so that you’d allow or enable members of your own house to attack someone on your behalf and delete your own false tweets about the person you’re attacking, then it’s obvious that grandeur is what you’re shooting for, not an honest conversation, not “community”, but grandeur.
Either way, I’ll continue doing my thing and highlighting artists that I love and that I find worthy of praise, and while I initially mentioned the house of Lepore as a way to spotlight their contributions to the ball scene and the larger LGBTQ+ space of Austin, I refuse to highlight people that show me that their rhetoric of community spirit pales in comparison to their inherent need to be shady for no fucking reason. So consider this their last mention on the show. The nightlife scene is a brief blip in time in comparison to the rest of our lives that we have, and if they’d rather spend this time being complete asshats for no reason, then they will get zero mention from this podcast going forward because people like that don’t deserve any attention, hopefully others in the scene will take notice and allow these faux-legends to snuff themselves out via their shitty attitudes.
On a brighter note- I’m really looking forward to my silent retreat. I’ll be focusing on exercising, doing yoga, and reading the library of books that’ve been waiting for me, as well as meditating and hiking. It’ll be really awesome to connect back with my physical and mental spaces that I had prior to the gym closures. I miss the rhythm of peace that I had set up for myself pre-quarantine.
Hope everyone is finding their own paths to peace of mind during this quarantine, remember that your worth is beyond what you measure in western standards of “productivity” Love y’all very much. 💞✨